A formula is created as a tool to be used to produce a consistent desired result. For a math algorithm it’s a precise rule, or set of rules, specifying how to solve a problem. For a recipe, it’s a set of instructions for making something with food. Christian parents want to teach their children how to make decisions from a biblical worldview and be righteously self disciplined. However, as children grow older, many parents struggle with continuing to be their child’s main source of influence. Frankly, somewhere along the way respect is lost or was never attained. Once respect is lost, your ability to influence becomes powerless.
I’ve heard comments over the years stating…”If only there was a formula for parenting.” Will you allow me to be so bold and state there is a formula for parents? A formula you can use and trust to produce a consistent desired result.
Parental Influence Formula
Unconditional Love (Teaching + Modeling²) = Influence
Teaching:
Teaching is the seed that is planted in your children through some form of communication and/or demonstration.
Plus
Modeling:
Modeling is the abundance of water that causes the seed to germinate. When your children watch you successfully live out the expectations you set for them, you gain tremendous respect. Notice the exponent. This means you model more than you teach. In other words, be repetitive more in your modeling than in your talking.
Multiplied by
Unconditional Love:
Teaching and modeling are wrapped in and multiplied by unconditional love. Unconditional love encompasses the warmth of the sun, the rain, the dew, the fertilizer, and the pruning that produces rich-vibrant-colorful fruit. Unconditional love is your secret weapon against competing influencing sources. It is absolutely impossible for a worldview influence to give your child unconditional love. Outside of God, the only way your child can fully satisfy their hunger for acceptance is from your unconditional love.
Equals
Influence:
Defined as the action or process of producing effects on the actions, behavior, opinions, etc., of another or others. Why is it so important to be the influential leader for your children? Obtaining influence gains you respect. When you have respect, you have their heart!
Parents today are looking for solutions. Many are solely focused on correcting their children’s “behaviors”. Worldview influences are solely focused on persuading your children’s “beliefs”. Without losing focus on “behaviors”, parents must put more attention to influencing their children’s “beliefs”. The solution is the parental influence formula.
